best films 2005?

12.29.2005
here's the first opinion i stumbled on for the best films of 2005...

for the most part i would agree. and if the "we saved the best for last" motto is true, then the nod for brokeback comes as no surprise. i think america has embraced the film with some caution and takes comfort knowing in-advance, that the two cowboys don't end up leaving their wives for one another. i hope to live to see the day when hollywood delivers a huge film where two gay characters are the focus and that they end up remaining together, with a healthy relationship and a family.

yes breaders, we do have them just like you although those in power would like to present us as disfunctional and or standing behind "your god" spewing "he wouldn't approve". therefore, instilling further ideas of false strength, longevity and superiority for heterosexual relationships. since their isn't an idiots guide to relationships for either side, we all jump in with the best intentions. as long as the heteros are in control we wont have the opportunity to marry and raise a family and prove that we are just as capable as anyone else. with this in mind it's so easy for "them" to say "look, they can't make it work" then sit back and fuck up their own relationship. i'm stepping of my soapbox so we can get to the nods...

The best of the best
Which brings us to the subject of 10-best lists. In alphabetical order, here are my picks for 2005:

“Brokeback Mountain” (directed by Ang Lee). Annie Proulx’s wrenching 1997 New Yorker story, about two men who carry on a secret affair over a couple of decades, could easily have been turned into a snicker-inviting blunder. Miraculously, the movie seems to have inspired everyone involved, and especially Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal as the lovers who will not label what they feel.

“Brothers” (Susanne Bier). A devastating Danish film about a career soldier and family man who is shipped off to Afghanistan, where he is captured and forced into an impossible “Sophie’s Choice” situation with another prisoner. Connie Nielsen stands out as the wife who thinks he’s dead and is tempted to start a new life with his troubled brother.

“Capote” (Bennett Miller). Dominated by Philip Seymour Hoffman’s uncanny impersonation of Truman Capote, this is an accomplished film on every level. Dan Futterman’s script carefully sets up the series of relationships that made Capote’s unlikely authorship of “In Cold Blood” possible. Miller’s direction, especially his handling of a near-perfect supporting cast, makes them credible.

“The Constant Gardener” (Fernando Meirelles). The Brazilian Meirelles, who earned a surprise Oscar nomination a couple of years ago for directing “City of God,” makes the leap to mainstream movies with this confident, provocative adaptation of John le Carre’s best-seller about a politically motivated murder. Ralph Fiennes was born to play the title character, an ineffectual British diplomat with an activist wife (the surprisingly excellent Rachel Weisz).

“Good Night, and Good Luck.” (George Clooney). Clooney made an impressive directing debut three years ago with “Confesssions of a Dangerous Mind,” but he’s gone on to another level with this instant classic about Edward R. Murrow’s mid-1950s television showdown with Sen. Joe McCarthy. David Strathairn and Frank Langella are the standouts in a splendid cast.

“A History of Violence” (David Cronenberg). The Canadian director demonstrates his mastery with this story of a seemingly normal family whose lives are turned around when the father reveals his true nature — by committing what appears to be a heroic act. The sense of dread is palpable, thanks in large part to Viggo Mortensen’s assured performance in the central role.

“King Kong” (Peter Jackson). New Zealand’s most famous director scores another fantasy home-run with this magnificent three-hour-plus remake of (and homage to) the 1933 classic about a giant ape, his captive girlfriend and their disastrous visit to the land of skyscrapers. Perhaps no other film this year has so enthusiastically suggested a passion for movies and an appreciation of their history.

“Lord of War” (Andrew Niccol). Another gifted New Zealander wrote and directed this scathing satire starring Nicolas Cage as a gun-runner who makes a fortune selling Cold War weapons to homicidal dictators. As he acquires a trophy wife, misleads his conscientious brother and competes with a more seasoned dealer, Cage brings a cranky deadpan flair to an almost hopelessly amoral character.

Mysterious Skin” (Gregg Araki). Araki’s eighth and strongest film is the most unsettling and memorable of the recent movies about child abuse. After a Little League coach molests them, two damaged boys grow up to lead entirely separate lives: one of them entrenched in comforting fantasy, the other acting out his frustrations through a dangerous street life.

“The Squid and the Whale” (Noah Baumbach). Who’d have guessed that a movie about a messy divorce could be so funny? Jeff Daniels delivers a career-best performance as a pompous writer, father and husband who can’t help putting his foot in his mouth. Laura Linney continues to astonish as the fed-up wife who sees a way out and takes it.

A second 10: “Broken Flowers,” “Crash,” “Downfall,” “Grizzly Man,” “Keane,” “Look at Me,” “Munich,” “Paradise Now,” “The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada,” “3-Iron.”

By John Hartl
Film critic
MSNBC

there's got to be a morning after

12.27.2005


twas the night before christmas....and by 6:30 pm i was already down for the count, even before the gifts we exchanged! i understand now that as you get older, the packages get smaller then eventually end up as these cutesy little boutique bags. christ, i could barely get my hand in it! it made me think of my early days, exploring 501's....that's another story we'll leave under the rug. all sarcasm aside, it was a very relaxing and memorable christmas eve. first stop, yet another holiday in haddock with my extended family, the fornataro's (dan, joan aka mummsy and danny) and our FAB designer friend from the big apple, kaj! imagine what goes through his mind, trapped out here in the sticks of pa! with no surprise, those in the know always sport at least one piece of black during the holiday celebration! and since we're mentioning holiday attire, someone should take personal note that if you plan on sporting blue velour and a potty mouth, people will remember! the gifts were thoughtful, mummsy's city chicken was delicious as always and diana krall sang holiday classics in the background; the cd of course. we took in war of the worlds and the will & grace holiday special. sad to say, no beverly. to bed 2:30 am.

morning came too quickly, then i was whisked off (11 am) to the pilot truck stop (don't even, it's christmas) to meet up with my brother, kennet for the next trip to mom's in berwick. as always mom went over the top; her apt. was beautifully decorated with victorian themed trimmings and her gifts, very unique & personal. we were soon joined by my uncle, tony, which meant it was time to eat! well that was the plan but i had changed that unfortunately. by 1 pm i was wiped out, again, so i headed for the bed for another long nap. once i woke up i was seated at the table for a delicious holiday dinner filled with ham, my favorite vegetable-lima beans and homemade scalped potatoes (they blow martha's recipe right out of the pot!) and sandy's famous cole-slaw. sorry it's her secret mix and it's not public. no snow for christmas, just cool high 30's and rain.

kennet and i left around 3:30 pm and headed back to nepa. by 4:30 pm i was back on the road, driving to the big b for my shift 5-11 pm. funny, people rent movies like crazy on christmas night. we had shoppers all the way up to 11 pm. then 11:20 pm came and i headed back home, which takes half an hour one way, to unpack and unwind. all in all it was a wonderful time with both family's, it's just never enough time. i will say the only thing missing this holiday was diva.


this week i'll look forward to visiting with my other friends joe and peter. by the weekend david and wendy will have arrived from boston and we'll celebrate the new year at moms.

thanks to all of you for putting a little sparkle in my holiday! i needed that...

still time left to vote

12.26.2005
i really enjoy this blog of mine. it allows me to express myself and share points of interest with just about anyone who might be interested in a moment of being ron b.. yes, it takes a great deal of time and patience but i never look at it as "work". it's a labor of love. seems others agree...the guys at best gay blogs have nominated me for "best gay blog 2005". i never imagined this kind of recognition and i'm so grateful for the consideration. if you would like to cast your vote, for my blog, click here. i'm under choice #3 (what is best gay blog). for those of you who aren't part of "our family" fear not, you wont have to face anything too "un-natural" by going to the link. i would appreciate your continued support and consideration. i would also like to mention one other blog that i enjoy visiting very much- large tony. his blog is well designed, thought provoking and best of all, well written. find his blog nomination under choice #1 for "best reviewed blog 2005". vote deadline 12/31/2005!

be marry, just a little

12.24.2005
why not consider making this holiday season, different.

help yourself and others to realize that christmas isn't about how much you spent or how many "gifts" you gave.


make sure that you travel safely and drink responsibly. remember that there are many of us who want to be able to celebrate the season for years to come.

spending quality time with friends and family is most important. talk about what christmas really is, a celebration of life. let others know how much you appreciate them for who they are. be grateful for all the good things in your life. talk about how commercial the holidays have become and do what you can to change that into something magical and meaningful. help those who can't help themselves in any way you can; the gift of kindness costs nothing. the holidays can glisten for everyone; all we have to do is look deep inside ourselves.

make that change...

jake on brokeback

12.23.2005

here's a piece from tv guide i stumbled on...

Brokeback Star Scoffs at "Courage" Talk

by Matt Webb Mitovich

Amidst all of the media coverage of Ang Lee's Brokeback Mountain — and there has been just a bit — much has been made of the "courage" it took for two Hollywood leading men such as Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger to play Jack and Ennis, cowboys who, during the isolation of a sheepherding job, most unexpectedly fall fiercely and intimately in love with each other. Gyllenhaal, though, shrugs off the use of such a loaded, powerful word, saying, "All we did was service a story, something which, to this day, I feel is a lot bigger than any one person involved in the film.

"Does it take courage nowadays [to dramatize a gay romance] when people have very different opinions of what that type of relationship is? I guess," the actor allows. "But what is really courageous is people who are trying to be intimate in their real life and who are up against real obstacles. Heath and I, we were just making a movie for two months."

As both actors garner critical kudos for their performances, it's interesting to note that Gyllenhaal originally eyed the role that ended up going to Ledger. "When I read the script for the first time, I thought that Ang would want to cast me as Ennis and Heath as Jack," he reveals, "just because I felt Heath [like Jack] was more outgoing. You're used to him being a less passive presence. But when we were cast opposite what I thought, I realized that Ang recognized in both of us something that I don't think either of us saw. The want to push forward and progress and change things was something in Jack that I felt like I had, too, while Heath is the kind of guy who carries his heart on his shoulder, and is always protecting himself in different ways."

Once the roles were assigned, the rest fell into place, thanks to screenwriter Larry McMurtry's adaptation of Annie Proulx's novella. "I know it sounds very 'actory' of me, but the story is filled with so much subtext already, all I had to do, really, was show up to the set," says Gyllenhaal. "If you read the script, it's pages and pages of scene description for the actors, about how one's feeling for the other is 'like 1,000 streams of blood rushing through his veins.' The words and the people and the ideas beneath it drove us. If we had tried to do anything more than what we do in the movie, it would have been overdoing it."

Indeed, Brokeback pulls not a single punch, not even shying away from the men's love scenes, which at the same time are intense and roused with emotion. "In this movie, the love scenes are not very different from the fight scenes," Gyllenhaal notes. "It is an exaggeration to say that Heath almost broke my nose [as has been reported], but yeah, it was very physical between the two of us.

"I was afraid of how Ang was going to shoot it," he continues. "I think it's fair to say that even he wasn't sure how he was going to shoot it, whether he was going to show the initial [moments] and then cut away to the outside of the tent. But I consider myself a relatively strong-minded person, and I probably would have fought [for my ideas] until it came out the way that it did. But Ang did do it that way, so no worries."

it's too big-make it go away

12.15.2005
you remember...faster than a speeding bullet, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound-----yes it's superman aka the man of steal! when i was younger i loved superman for a lot of reasons: he was the best looking supper hero at the time, he was strong, he helped people, he could fly and looked sexy in that body tight suit. over the years he hasn't changed too much, until now.

it has always been my contention that the film industry is run by many pigheaded, outspoken, male chauvinists who all seem to have a dark secret- penis envy. run a few titles through your mind and think about how many times we've seen naked women on screen. high number, yes? now think about how many times we've seen male nudity. perhaps they missed that conversation where dad tells jr. all about the birds and the bees. and if he didn't miss it, then he forgot the part where dad said that the average guy's penis isn't all so well off as compared to a select few whom they later saw during their first encounter with johnny holmes. normal is somewhat small, now get over it.

yes i know it's a hetro world for the most part but does that make it ok to constantly show women as a sex object first? i think not. i'm surprised more women haven't been screaming their heads off, always being denied a peak at the package. i think it comes down to yes or no for both sex's, equally. either show it or cut the scene. i'm remembering the recent articles about colin's cut nude scene in "home at the end of the world" and how the initial test audiences were affected by it. reports stated that the women literally went hog wild for the irish sausage and the men got uncomfortable, disgusted and left. america is so hoydedoydee about nudity and i'll never understand it. perhaps if we had been relaxed about it from the beginning we would be more comfortable with it now. i think much of the up-tight stuff comes from how focused our big corps and add agencies are about only showing the "beautiful people" to the public. perfect abs, boobs ready to bounce out and backsides that scream skateboard test area.

and now the rest of the news..
Brandon Routh, who is set to play Superman in the upcoming movie, must be feeling that same pride I felt when I realized I needed to switch from Magnum to MagnumXL condoms. The actor's package will be digitally reduced because the movie execs found it too distracting.
The new Superman is giving movie bosses a headache - because of the size of his bulge.

They fear Brandon Routh's profile in the superhero's skintight costume could be distracting, reports the Sun.

Hollywood executives have ordered the makers of Superman Returns to cover it up with digital effects.

The Sun's source said: "It's a major issue for the studio. Brandon is extremely well endowed and they don't want it up on the big screen.

Not only is this more proof that Hollywood executives ruin everything, but it suggests they have no interest in accurately portraying Kal-El (not that Kal-El) Think about it, Superman was definitely hung. All Kryptonians were. It has to do with gravity. It's science.

the new Ractis

12.14.2005

Toyota Motor Corporation (TMC) announced the nationwide launch in Japan of the new Ractis*1 compact passenger car through Toyopet and Toyota Corolla dealers.

Meant to allow four adults to experience driving in comfort, not only in the city, but also on the highway, the Ractis was designed with “high-speed, high-capacity styling” as its theme, paying particular attention to performance, function and styling. It has a high level of performance that allows for spirited driving, as well as a comfortable and easy-to-use interior and a stylish exterior.



Despite its compact size, the Ractis combines a roomy interior—the biggest in its class*2—with styling that makes the car look nimble. New features aimed at making driving fun combine with superb driving performance for an exhilarating experience. Furthermore, a high level of versatility, the use of class-surpassing, high-quality equipment, and class-leading safety and environmental performance make the Ractis a “one car does it all”, top-quality compact car.


The Ractis is also available in a Welcab. Welcabs are specially equipped versions of Toyota production models with factory-installed features designed specifically for disabled people. Welcabs have a broad range of applications, and feature numerous specifications that make the most of the base vehicle’s features.

*1 Derived from “runner with activity and space”

*2 By comparison with vehicles of similar engine displacement

*3 Specified by the Law Concerning the Rational Use of Energy

skip the twig's!

12.13.2005
concerned about content,
nutritional value
and fond of the stick?

consider judy's lovesticks breadsticks.


they offer a wide variety of choices from sticks to crackers.

yummy, yummy yummy i've got love in my tummy!

like no other

i'm not a "label" kind of guy but after watching the commercial for the new sony bravia, i had to share it.

they say it's "colour like no other"...see for yourself.

we could use a few creative minds like this in the white house!

easy to love











in case you haven't heard , somebody has finally made a wallet that's functional, sturdy, slim and cool to boot! check out all the jimi wallets here.

dreams never die

12.12.2005

many years ago i had the privilege of seeing the show, live on stage, in boston. unfortunately, jennifer holiday wasn't part of the cast at that time. none the less it was a show and a moment i'll never forget. for those of us in our 30's -40's, most can still recall what happened the moment when we first heard jennifer begin "and i am telling you". if there is a "performer" in all of us then she's the one who uncovered our secret.

i'm hopeful that the screen version lives up to the legacy of dream girls, time will tell.

LA critics back cowboy love story

12.11.2005

Ang Lee's Brokeback Mountain, a film about two gay ranch hands who fall in love, has been named 2005's best film by Los Angeles film critics.

The film, which stars Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger, also earned Lee the best director prize.

Phillip Seymour Hoffman took best actor for his portrayal of author Truman Capote in Capote.

Vera Farmiga won best actress for playing a wife and mother who becomes addicted to drugs in Down To The Bone.

With 12 weeks to go until the Academy Awards, the critics' choices mark the start of the countdown to the Oscars.

Brokeback Mountain, adapted from a story by E Annie Proulx, also took top honours at the Venice Film Festival in September.

It has only just gone on release in the US, and does not reach UK cinemas until next month.

Eclectic film-maker

In recent years Lee has carved a name for himself as one of cinema's most eclectic film-makers. The Taiwanese director's other work includes martial arts drama Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, comic book adaptation Hulk, and Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility.

Ledger was the runner-up for the best actor prize, while Dame Judi Dench was the runner-up for the best actress award for her role in Mrs Henderson Presents.

Thriller A History of Violence was the runner-up for best film, with its director David Cronenbourg the runner-up for the best director award.

Catherine Keener took the best supporting actress prize for her work in Capote as well as three other films - The 40-Year-Old Virgin, The Interpreter, and The Ballad of Jack and Rose. Runner-up was Junebug's Amy Adams, who plays a pregnant young woman from the southern US who is captivated by her sister-in-law.

William Hurt took best supporting actor for his role in A History of Violence, with Good Night and Good Luck's Frank Langella the runner-up.

The Los Angeles Film Critics Association's awards will be handed out on 17 January. Next year's Oscars will take place on 5 March.

Story from BBC NEWS:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/2/hi/entertainment/4518430.stm

Published: 2005/12/11 12:06:25 GMT

© BBC MMV

celebrate

12.09.2005
Holiday Eating Tips

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an "eggnog-aholic" or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it!!!! Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread tips: start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by:

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming
"WOO-HOO what a ride!"
thanks kaj!

ford motor


FORD MOTOR-Yanks It!

Ford Motor Co's Jaguar and Land Rover luxury brands are pulling all advertising from gay publications, the company said today, after facing a boycott threat from a conservative religious group.

The American Family Association had called for a boycott of the carmaker's vehicles in May, but suspended the move in June for six months after talks with Ford dealers. The six months have now ended.

"While we still have a few differences with Ford, we feel that our concerns are being addressed in good faith and will continue to be addressed in the future," Donald Wildmon, chairman of the Tupelo, Mississippi-based group, said in a statement.

Ford, which has seen its US sales fall in all but two of the last 18 months, denied the decision was made under pressure from the AFA, which has criticised Ford for being too gay-friendly.

Ford spokesman Mike Moran said the company's cancellation of the ads is part of a plan to streamline the brands' marketing strategy. He said Ford's Volvo brand will continue to buy ads in gay-oriented publications.

A group of 19 organisations that support homosexual rights said they were "deeply dismayed" by Ford's action and expected the carmaker to meet with representatives from the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community this week.

"We expect Ford to publicly reaffirm its historic support for our community," the groups said in a joint statement on the web page of the Human Rights Campaign, the largest US gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender civil rights organisation.

Ford declined to say how much it had spent on advertising in gay publications.

Ford's Ford, Lincoln and Mercury brands have not advertised in gay media.

quality selection price

12.03.2005


i was first introduced to "crate & barrel" the day i arrived in boston, mass some ten years ago. at the time this particular location was one of their flag-ship stores; if my memory is correct, there were at least five or six floors to shop! they had everything from furniture to day-to-day household items. it was a kitch heaven if you know what i mean.



since then, crate & barrel continues to offer a wide variety of items for everyday living. Good designs, unique items and a fair price have always lead me back, time and time again.




the company's latest adventure, cb2 , is a targeted direction for those up and coming urbanites who crave a more modern selection and lines that your grandmother would never think of owning. visit the site and feast your eyes on some really cool things. the site design is easy to navigate through and the layouts are a feast for the scene's.

you can't always get what you need

11.30.2005

Cris Kerr highlights Naltrexone in her latest issue of 'Case Health - Health Success Stories'.

Naltrexone is traditionally used to help people who have a narcotic or alcohol addiction stay drug free. Naltrexone is used after the patient has stopped taking drugs or alcohol. It works by blocking the effects of narcotics or by decreasing the craving for alcohol. U.S. National Library of Medicine

Cris recently became aware of a drug that appeared to stop the progression of Multiple Sclerosis, potentially enhancing the quality of life of many Multiple Sclerosis (MS) sufferers.

The drug is Naltrexone (also known as ReVia) and Cris's 'Health Success Stories' database contains a growing body of compelling anecdotal evidence that Low Dose Naltrexone (LDN) works, and; it works well - BUT, sufferers can't get it.

"Naltrexone has not achieved mainstream acceptance as a treatment option for MS due to absence of clinical trial data. Research, drug development, and clinical trials are commercially-driven by sponsors. That's okay, but there's no recognized body that can officially step up to the plate to speak and act on behalf of patients. I know this because I've tried, without success, to find an authority that is sanctioned to do so."

The present system is inequitable. It doesn't place sufficient value on patient health success stories. It doesn't place sufficient value on advocating for the patient. It doesn't place sufficient value on patient-driven research or clinical trials. If it did, there would be a body sanctioned to speak and act on a promising body of patient testimonials.

How many stories similar to the LDN story are out there? We don't know, because they haven't all been collected, stored, and shared. That makes me feel uneasy and should make you feel uneasy.

We need an organisation chartered to act on this type of evidence; an organisation that values patient testimony and can make recommendations (without prejudice) on behalf of patients from all corners of the globe.

every now and then

11.22.2005
first and foremost....
i'm no fan of the television. i choose to spend my time doing other things. there are a few times i get invited to a sporting event and i go. not because i think i'll enjoy myself but because a friend insisted that i need to experience this...same applies to tv shows. several members at the big b where i work have told me time and time again "ron, you have to see this show! go and rent all the dvd's right now!". after a few days more of pondering the idea, i gave in. i'm now four episodes into season 1 and i'm hooked. the pilot episode was all it took to kick start my hunger. i remember sitting very still as the credits rolled thinking how great it was to watch a show that's well written, well acted, interesting and educational to boot! i liked when doctor house posed the question that are doctors here to treat patients or are we here to treat the illness?

the show tagged doctor house's remarks-ideas as "house-isms". here are a few of them...

You know me. Hostility makes me shrink up like a... I can'’t think of a non-sexual metaphor.
- Spin

What makes a guy start drooling? Chase, were you wearing your short-shorts?
- Spin

Cameron Who was that?”
House “Angelina Jolie. I call her mom. Who thinks that'’s sexy?
- DaddyƂ’s Boy

no i passed on the idea of being a doctor but i still find the medical stuff interesting. i think in some respects that this ongoing facination of medical everything helped me during times of my recent hospital stays; my m.s. testing. many of the different test & procedures seemed almost familiar to me so naturally i wasn't completely on the edge when i went in for my spinal tap. when i saw the huge needle enter my back-into my spinal column, on the monitor above me...that's when the fear woke up.

anyway, watch this show house m.d.. just make sure you don't have a weak stomach; they do "visually" explain a few important things.
11.20.2005

i recently visited my buddy matt's blog and found something well worth sharing! :> matt

Smoke some stink…get smarter?

smokin in vancouver

A recent study shows that smoking pot can actually be good for your brain. How? At first the concept boggled your writer’s mind also…but after careful consideration, it sort of started to make sense.

For the longest time, especially in traditionalist and conservative scientific studies, pot has been the bad guy. Being blamed for memory loss, impaired learning, and causing a host of other health problems way down the line. But a sort of light has been shined on the situation.

While most drugs, namely coke, booze, and smack suppress brain cell growth, cannabinoids have actually shown to create new neurons in rats’ hippocampuses. The hippocampus is the part of your noggin responsible for learning and memory. The study held true for both plant-derived cannibis and synthetic forms of THC (delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol), which is the compound responsible for getting smokers high.

So long as studies keep going on like this, new interest will continue to spark, showing how the use of cannabinoids can improve human health. Marijuana has been used in the recent past to address many health problems, such as pain, nausea, vomiting, seizures caused by epilepsy, ischemic stroke, cerebral trauma, tumours, and multiple sclerosis.

A few final points:

  • Don’t see this as an excuse to puff more than moderately. It is based on LAB RATS.
  • The dose given to the lab rats was 100 times more potent than the plant-derived cannabis.
  • Make it happen. You were going to anyway.

Get more info on this breaking puff news here.

toys for boys

i have long been a fan of toys. in my younger days i had to have one of everything it seemed. i would spend countless hours, building brave new worlds where the good always conquered evil. now as an adult i have a greater appreciation for them. these days i spend my time collecting them, only to stand peacefully still on a variety of shelves throughout my flat.

a few days ago while on one of my web surf jonts, i stumbled on this, the new phase of action figures? i don't know too much about this particular one, but without a doubt the detailing is too remarkable. this could certainly change any ideas of fighting; kids may be prone to simply display them. is it teaching art appreciation at an early age? i'm not sure. kids are by nature, hands on. depending how their parents approach the situation could later effect the child in a variety of ways, some that may not be so beneficial. i guess time will tell but personally speaking it's great to see an action figure that looks this good!

music, november 2005

11.07.2005
music

not a day goes by without it...




just announced is the release of the new simply red single "perfect love". here is a link to a download page with 15 versions available! have a blast. if this is any indication of what's to come, it will be amazing!


the wait has ended...

Kate Bush
Aerial

(EMI)



After 12 years of waiting
Kate Bush fans finally get their hands on an album of new material. A double album-sized helping of new songs should keep most fans happy with 16 tracks to delve into. Disc one is a varied set of numbers which mainly centre around her private life, with odes to her son and a moving song about the loss of her mother. But at times these songs feel too personal and are hard to decipher with dense and difficult melodies. They encompasse a range of musical styles - from folk ("Bertie") to new age ("Pi") and classic Kate Bush ("How to be Invisible"). However, some of these tracks never really achieve lift-off and could have been left on the recording studio floor. The Kate Bush of "Cloudbusting" and "Wuthering Heights"-fame is in there but struggles to get out. After the flatness of disc one, the second disc is full of surprises. It's an old-fashioned concept album that takes the listener on a journey. And what a journey! Bush has written a lyric poem set to music, which has an epic quality, transporting the listener to a deeply lush and fertile landscape. Lyrically cryptic, but strangely seductive, side two is the album Pink Floyd might have made in 1979 if Bush had been their lead singer. Concept albums are not everyone's cup of tea - but this is a masterpiece. Reviewer: Darren Waters

i think july 2005

11.03.2005
i think...
this is the part where i spill all my marbles, regardless who might fall!

10 july, 2005
would i consider myself political? no, but i will say that half the voters knew which lever to pull. the other half are so proud of their ignorance.

10 july, 2005
people who stand at the checkout, on a cell phone, while their products are being rung-up should be slapped! how frickin' rude! someone is trying to assist you and you can't even give them the attention they deserve. if your not handicapped, don't park in their spots. if you're so god-damn special you should have been able to send a personal servant to pick your crap up! stores should be allowed somehow to ticket these pricks for breaking the law. we need to raise the cost of these fines; there loaded and they can afford it. the money should then go to help the handicapped. god knows the money isn't spent on parking lot repairs.f you take your children to the store with you, remember they are your responsibility. store clerks have enough to worry about. if your kids act like animals while they are along, drop them off at the local zoo first. when it comes time to leave, go to your children. don't stand 30 feet from them and shout "tabetha! i am leaving!" funny how some parents forget they are in a place of business. perhaps they think since their spending money they can do what ever they want...wrong answer! no matter where you go these days, there are plenty of trash containers for all of our waste. what amazes me is those idiots that shove small paper items in the ash tray area. clue...paper burns and turns to fire! i'll do my best to stop by your next garden party and bring all of my dollar general receipts! we'll turn it into a disco inferno! we spend too much time and money on "famous" people. movie stars and sports icons who get paid millions to take chances and remember all the lines are talented yes but not worth all they get. fire fighters save lives, at the same time risking their own lives and don't get half what the hollywood muscle men get. does it make senes that a stuntman might get 2 grand to jump from a burning building? sure it does, this way you don't have to take the risk. you could skip paying inflated ticket prices and jump from one your self if you're that damn curious about it. oh, i forgot. you might risk the chance of an injury. we wouldn't want that now, would we? ver notice that most of the adds we see everyday are filled with all the "beautiful people". big bulges, racked and ready to spread some sugar. what do big boobies have to do with a canary yellow hummer? if you're in a heterosexual relationship you might get your own personal hummer behind closed doors but buying one wont bring the pretty lady home to you. the average guys "mr wiggly" is not even close in size to what we see in the bvd's! remember its you and yours that you fluff and fold and not his. we should try putting alien creatures in all of our day to day adds. they might scare a few people but we would pay more attention to the products and not weather or not the alien is male or female.

25 july, 2005
the subject of "customer behavior" is one i think of and write about often. as far back as i can remember they have continued to show me just how rude and stupid a person can be without even trying. that's not to say that all customers have those characteristics because there are a few exceptions from time to time. unfortunately, the good ones are 1 in a hundred. at my work we have a selfserve ice cream case which is next to a small free-standing display rack. seems every couple of days, someone tries to squeeze through the small gap between the 2 units and avoid walking around in order to get into the checkout line. on the front of the ice cream cooler is a large magnetic sign that features all the flavors we carry. so yesterday this wildebeest of a woman thinks she'll make the right of passage; that in itself was funny to see! anyway, as she fought her way through, her elizabeth taylor maternity top caught the end corner of the magnetic sign. obviously, the sign fell to the ground. not three seconds later, a tall slender lady (hilton wanna-be!) followed in her footsteps. with her left heel firmly on the ground, she placed her right shoe quick as a whistle smack dab on the fallen sign! she thought nothing of it! she then pranced gleefully to the counter, rented her movies and pulled away in a white 4 door jag. screw charging members late fees, we should be charging dumb ass fees! another on going favorite is the grad student wanna be who calls and asks if we have a movie in stock for rental. i quickly type the title in the data base and respond "i'm sorry all 47 copies are rented out" a brief pause of silence then he says "are you sure?". the wish i could response..."ahhhhh no i am a little incompetent so hold for a moment and i'll ask the duck who's swimming around in the center of our indoor, employee only, swimming pool.

eye candy

10.30.2005

i spend a great deal of time on my blog as well as viewing other blogs of interest. if you are looking for a little visual stimulation you might consider checking out peter's site "boybox" (from turkey) for a sweet collection of unforgettable images. here is just a sample of what you'll find...things could get messy, so come prepared!

the jolly green giant

10.28.2005

Voice of Jolly Green Giant dies

The American entertainer whose voice boomed out "Ho, ho, ho" in the Jolly Green Giant vegetable adverts for decades has died at the age of 80.

Elmer Dresslar, originally from Kansas, died of cancer, his daughter announced in California where he had been living since his retirement. Dresslar periodically re-recorded the famous jingle and sang a fresh "Ho, Ho, Ho" about 10 years ago. "If nothing else, it put my sister and I through college," said daughter Teri. "He never got tired of it," she added.

The phrase, one of the most distinctive taglines in advertising history, was created by Leo Burnett. A spokeswoman for General Mills, the owner of the Green Giant Company, said Dresslar had been "the most consistent and most frequent voice of the Jolly Green Giant over the years - the one consumers are going to recognise". The figure viewers saw on screen was Keith Wegeman, an Olympic ski jumper. A navy veteran, Dresslar studied voice in Chicago in the 1950s and by the following decade had carved out a career singing in clubs, on television and in advertising jingles, the Associated Press news agency notes. He recorded 15 albums with The Singers Unlimited jazz group and appeared on the CBS television show In Town Tonight from 1955 to 1960.

Other jingles he recorded advertised Rice Krispies cereal, Amoco oil, Dinty Moore canned beef stew and Marlboro cigarettes.

Story from BBC NEWS:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/2/hi/americas/4380434.stm

Published: 2005/10/27 01:29:13 GMT

© BBC MMV

the banana

10.27.2005

After reading this, you'll NEVER look at a banana in the same way again!

Bananas containing three natural sugars - sucrose, fructose and glucose combined with fiber, a banana gives an instant, sustained and
substantial boost of energy. Research has proven that just two bananas provide enough energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder the banana is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes. But energy isn't the only way a banana can help us keep fit. It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet.

Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND amongst people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating a banana. This is because bananas contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier. PMS: Forget the pills - eat a banana. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.

Anemia: High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of haemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia.

Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt, making it the perfect to beat blood pressure. So much so, the US Food and Drug Administration has just
allowed the banana industry to make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of blood
pressure and stroke.

Brain Power: 200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) school were helped through their exams this year by eating bananas at breakfast, break, and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium-packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert.

Constipation: High in fiber, including bananas in the diet can help restore normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting to laxatives.

Hangovers: One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make a banana milkshake, sweetened with honey. The banana calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.

Heartburn: Bananas have a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eating a banana for soothing relief.

Morning Sickness: Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keep blood sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.

Mosquito bites: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of a banana skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.

Nerves: Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.

Overweight and at work? Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and crisps. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded that, to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels steady.

Ulcers: The banana is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases.
It also neutralizes over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach.

Temperature control: Many other cultures see bananas as a "cooling" fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In Thailand, for example, pregnant women eat bananas to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD): Bananas can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood enhancer tryptophan.

Smoking: Bananas can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.

Stress: Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby
reducing our potassium levels. These can be rebalanced with the help of a high-potassium banana snack.

Strokes: According to research in "The New England Journal of Medicine, "eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death by strokes by as much as 40%!

Warts: Those keen on natural alternatives swear that if you want to kill off a wart, take a piece of banana skin and place it on the wart, with the yellow side out. Carefully hold the skin in place with a plaster or surgical tape!

So, a banana really is a natural remedy for many ills. When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrate, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the best value foods around.

So maybe its time to change that well-known phrase so that we say, "A banana a day keeps the doctor away!"

PS Bananas must be the reason monkeys are so happy all the time!

george bush remains...



64 things about me you might want to know

10.17.2005
1. Be honest, it's not that hard.
2. Please don't ask about anything to do with George Bush.
3. Popcorn is one of my favorite snacks, pop secret homestyle.
4. Pieces are far too romantic for today's world.
5. It sucks that we are controlled so much of our time by someone else.
6. At my age I still have problems spelling, it's embarrassing.
7. I never attended college and barley graduated high school.
8. Common scense is my strong point and intellect comes second.
9. I recently learned a few things about automotive repair and I liked it.
10. The right to marriage should be available to all regardless of sexual orientation.
11. I wish my relationship with my sister was better.
12. I hope to live to see the day when cancer & aids are gone forever.
13. Gerry Anderson'’s "Thunderbirds Are Go" is a favorite.
14. My top 2 favorite bands-The Blue Nile & Everything But The Girl.
15. Advertising in general has become too sexual.
16. I would imagine life in the 50's to be better.
17. Chicken & Fish preferred. The red stuff is out.
18. Pot is illegal because it's bad for your health… so why is'nt fast food illegal?
19. My drink-Johnny Walker Black w/water.
20. Bottom, always.
21. Love deep, sexy house music.
22. I feel incomplete without a partner.
23. The BBC and not NBC.
24. Keith Haring's art has always interested me.
25. I have a cat named Graham.
26. My MS buddy is Joan Fornataro- AKA Mummsy.
27. I want to go back to Montreal once more.
28. Sometimes technology makes people become lazy.
29. Aren’t there enough cable channels already?
30. No one should die alone.
31. Intimacy or sex? Intimacy.
32. I sleep on the right side of the bed.
33. My favorite season is the fall.
34. Schools should spend more time talking about current affairs.
35. If more people were happy inside, the drug abuse problem would lessen.
36. There isn't always tomorrow..
37. A right turn on red is a cultural advantage living in NEPA.
38. If people choose to accept money for sexual favors, so what. Everybody’s happy.
39. I think Meryl Streep or Dianne Keaton would make a good leader for our country.
40. If only more men approached things from a compassionate perspective...
41. Corporate control has gotten too strong for our own good.
42. If your minutes hang like hours, you better refocus.
43. Why most straightmen can't dance boggles my mind.
44. The term "Metrosexual" is a cop-out.
45. I have tons of respect for Martha Stewart.
46. If we are as "wise" as we are told then why hasn't minimum wage gone up?
47. I think it would be cool to be a butler for an old english family.
48. Steam your vegetables.
49. There should be more diners.
50. $40,000 for an automobile? That's fucked up.
51. Disposable razors are bad for the environment.
52. My relationship with my father died years ago.
53. Game night with friends is good.
54. Read the ingredients.
55. A friend once said I buy all the right books.
56. Don't have children if you don't have the time for them.
57. We spend too much time working, just to get by.
58. Masturbation is healthy.
59. The x-files was one of the best television series ever done.
60. When rich folks "break the law" why are they given different treatment?
61. What's it all about, Alfie?
62. I fell in love with my best friend in Boston, then i lost him.
63. I'm amazed that I survived my childhood, it was a sad and dark time.
64. You should be able to borrow against your car insurance expense; do the math.

Chances are good I‚’ll have more to share‚…

the new GJLA

10.13.2005
I'm happy to say that the time has finally come when being in your teens isn't so terrible after all; especially if you happen to be gay.

as i have said in previous articles, i think that it's great that young gays & lesbians are "out and about" more than ever before. when i think back to my teenage years, i can vividly recall all the secrets we kept to ourselves and the times spent together were always somewhere in the "dark". we didn't have any safe clubs to go to. there were little to no support groups to share our fears with and no one who would look upon us with respect. when i collect all that i can remember, it amazes me that we have survived all the hate and brutality that we had been wrongfully subject to. yes time does have away of healing some of the social scars we bare but it also empowers future generations to continue the fight for acceptance.

today's teens are the new hope on the horizon. they have stepped up to the plate in unusually high numbers and made their thoughts and feelings publicly unavoidable. the right wing and the religious groups wouldn't hesitate pointing the finger at one of us, we're adults and we care too much sometimes what the "others" are thinking. teens on the other hand are bold and brass and only their parents can point the finger. even so, the chances of them listening to their parents advise aren't always so good.

gay teens today have made a voice for themselves. they have stood up and demanded to be counted. they have formed strong alliances with one another as well as developed large numbers of support groups. their information network s are strong and their "other" supporters are very powerful people and organizations. they are the new GJLA (gay justice league of america) and their not about to stand down to anyone or anything.


recently time magazine ran a feature article on gay teens and their new powerful awareness revolution. in the segment you'll find some interesting facts and figures on gay teens as well as a few points of interest should you want to learn more about them and their agenda. one of the most interesting and informative sites that were mentioned was inqueery, a site devoted to gay & lesbian teens. founded by chad thompson, the organization addresses lgbt issues on high school and college campuses. the site offers a wealth of information for both teens and adults. i applaud chad's efforts and hope that you will share his site with others.

my health & wellness

10.12.2005
health & wellness...

here, my intention is to speak of my illness, ms (multiple sclerosis) kind of as an endless stream of facts, feelings and everything else.

the official word came from my neurologist, dr. farell, in april of 2003. oddly enough i think i handled it pretty well at the time. i had done some research on my own in the fall of 2002. after just a few weeks of comparing my symptoms to a few possibilities, i had a good idea what was wrong. i also had some help & endless support from a woman i barley knew. she would later become the one person in my life who knows exactly how and what i feel; sadly, she feels it to.

near the end of august 2003, my friend of many years (dan) was going to move away from his parents home in hazelton, pa to our capital city harrisburg. there he had accepted a teaching position in the hershey school district and was about to begin a new life. the plan in motion was that i would take the weekend off, drive to haddock friday late afternoon, accompany his dad for the ride down then return the next day to return the moving van. that friday morning i woke up and started getting my flat ready for my weekend away. phone calls, emails, extra cat food...normal stuff. as the day continued, i packed my bags and then showered. got dressed and started gathering a few things i had forgotten earlier.

all of a sudden i started feeling really "zippy" like i just downed three expresso's. i started literally racing around the apartment. within a few minutes my heart rate seemed to double and i started feeling nauseous. then i started getting dizzy followed by a cold sweat. i put up with it for about ten minutes then i got scared. what the hell was happening? i remember at that point deciding to go nextdoor to kate & art's since no one else was in the building at that time. kate works for a vet and has two kids so i thought she might be able to give me a little insight as to my condition. i couldn't even stand still for a second all the while she listened to me babbling about everything that was happening to me. she wanted to take me to the hospital but i declined. i said i would call my doctor and then thanked her for being there for me. so i phoned the doc and he called in two scrips for me-one for anxiety and one for the dizzy stuff. from the time this all started till three hours later, i spent all of my time either trying to lye down while the room spun around or pacing the apartment from front to back. it was a cold hell where i was. i dreaded the call to dan canceling my trip and my help. he was counting on me for this and i really wanted to be there for him; something else had other plans for me. happy to say dan was understanding about me not coming and was also concerned as to what was happening to me.

a month or so later, i started getting these pains in my head which weren't your typical headache's. they continued even though my doctor was treating me for allergy-sinus issues. nothing seemed to be working, still had the headaches, dizziness and the anxiety. after sharing some of my ideas, a few arguments and a variety of silly excuses from the doc, he agreed to have an mri done. at the time i had no idea how difficult it was to have an mri approved let alone the cost, $3,000.00! i think it was mid october around 9 am. i remember the cold breeze and how nervous i was...oops maybe it was anxiety?



time to pause, i'm tired. they didn't build rome in a day! i'll be back tomorrow...

i think, october 2005

10.03.2005
i think...
this is the part where i spill all my marbles, regardless who might fall!

1 october, 2005
i've just gotten home from yet another shift at the big b! today wasn't very different from any other day; more of the same. it amazes me that someone can do the same thing, every couple of days, and only grasp most of its patterns. after being with them for at least seven months and asking the same routine questions, the stupids can only reply...oh, yeh, sorry. the response i wish i could say: "I'd ring your buzzer but i see the wiring is missing! what compels you to lay the dvd's on the counter where i have a difficult time reaching them? you know you can't "go home happy" if i don't scan the rentals and you pay the bill! it's always been our policy, to rent you need a membership card. with that in mind don't you think the member card is vital to your transaction? it would be nice, just once, if i didn't have to ask you for your god-damn member card every time you come here." once we are passed the initial exchange, its time to pay. isn't it wonderful, we haven't changed our rental rate for at least a few years; still $4.23. yet every time i wait on one of these stupids, they ask "how much?" then i have to wait till they root through their bag or pocket, rounding up the funds. then i notice, three persons down the line, miss lilly has that disgusted look on her face again. great, this stupid is taking too much time getting it together and now i'll have to deal with lily's anger. merry fucking christmas and thanks for all the anger i have to absorb because you just don't get it! now our time together is coming to an end. you re-educated yourself, magically, yes you added the change correctly! i know once i have the cash, you're gonna ask another dumb question, whens the movie due back? perhaps i gave you too much credit because you counted your own change? hey, look at that! its a bright yellow sticker on the cover of the rental box. it's in english and says 2 day rental...hum do you really need more time to figure it out? and if for some reason this process is too perplexing for you, we have delt you a bonus card answer! when you get home, read your sales receipt. look at that, right smack dab under the title of the movie you rented...due back 10/05/2005. aren't we just too clever for words?

lets step back a few, shall we...as i mentioned before, you need a membership to rent. all you need to do is fill out the new member application, provide us with a photo id and a major credit card (no deibt cards excepted) or a photo id and something else with your complete name and address on it (check, piece of mail, utility bill). most of them understand the photo id part although i have had a few ask "why the picture id?". what i wish i could say..."0h, thats for the talent scout from the ford modeling agency. they are always looking for a fresh face!". part two of this is the major credit card. to this i've gotten "what about my bank card?" how on earth did you miss that silver sequin from Phyllis Diller's prom gown they embossed on the front that says "debit". and now you're angry at me because thats all you can manage?. the final request is the complete name and address...you ask "can i use my social security card?" lets think about that, gosh it only has your name on it. poor poor you, the answer is now ding bat! a few have said "i have my driver registration card out in the car" dont tell me where the damn card is, just be polite and excuse yourself and go out to the car. every now and then i get one more moment to waste and step into the bonus round....after all we've been through, thanks to your silly questions, you decide to complain about how long it took just to open a membership. i wish i could..."i think first thing tomorrow you should quit your job and become a teacher. think of all t he children that would benefit from your flawless intellect!"

one of my favorite customers is the one that hears things that aren't even said...i had a guy come up to the counter and asked if we had the ken burns baseball documentary's to rent. i was sad to say that we didn't. he then got this puzzled look on his face and asked, so you don't carry documentary's? wow, did you drive yourself here?

wonka vision

9.12.2005
11 september, 2005
when i was just a little boy, i asked my mother what would i be? would i be handsome, would i be rich, here's what she said to me..." just be careful".

as i look back, i have to wonder what she really meant. i remember having a hundred or more questions to ask about the things that were going through my head, thoughts not every 13 year old has mind you. the response of "just be careful" certainly wasn't the best answer to all of my questions then but it did help me survive a few things over the years. there is one other important question that i arrived at later on in life that i wish now, i had asked back then..."what if he's straight?" better yet, "can we even be friends?" i don't think that anyone on the planet has the right answer to any of these, although some may qualify simply based on personal experience. in the end the reality of it is we all decide how we act and how we react. the path we travel is wide. there's no need to make it straight or narrow. just relax, listen, respect one another and open your eyes. chances are, you will see a world of pure imagination...

as i have mentioned before, i have been spending a lot of time with the boys downstairs (ed & matt) and as each time ends and the next one begins, i can only think of all the fun and countless hours of laughter we have, every time. hey, don't get the wrong idea...its not always hours and hours of drinking, smoking and dirty conversations. we have each spent a fair amount of personal time doing things for one another, simply as a means of helping a friend. ed's been working on the final repairs on my jetta (such a well toned, greasy mechanic), matts been sharing his music and playing his acoustic guitar for me (yeah, thats my soft side), i got to splash just a little color and added a few pieces of furniture to their apartment, ed's taken on the laundry detail knowing well off the department of health was soon to call, matts put more miles on the vacuum cleaner than ever before, ed's still trying to let other people talk once in a while but fails most times, matt has finally publicly spoken aloud of his dark secret love for "the buzzer", i found out what "dropping a duce" means along with what "dsl's" are. yeh, ed shaves it, matt loves to touch his stomach and i actually find a peacefully place to be myself amongst them.

of course there are times when some of our ideas clash, the views on pleasure are north & south and the definition of "clean" has three different versions. beyond all that, at the end of each day, we all have a few things in common...graham loves our hair, regular or menthal doesn't matter when it's the last three cigarettes and we all have come to love one another for who we are, not what we are.

if i had to choose one, the answer is easy...they already had.

to be continued...

film september, 2005

film...
it's a mental and visual experience i crave daily.

11 september, 2005
well it's finally arrived, ang lee's brokeback mountain. it comes as no surprise to me that it won the highest honor, the golden lion, at this years venice film festival. the next big question...will america embrace this controversial love story with an open mind? or will they spit more venom and blame the film makers for promoting our" "evil" lifestyle? time will tell what will be said. here is the movie poster, a brief synopsis and a link to the trailer.


Set against the sweeping landscapes of Wyoming and Texas, this epic love story tells of two young men -- a ranch-hand and a rodeo cowboy -- who meet in the summer of 1963 while driving cattle on a mountain range. They unexpectedly forge a lifelong connection, one whose complications, joys and tragedies provide a testament to the endurance and power of love.



HELLBENT

Opens
in select cities. September - October

hellbent-themovie.com

The first ever GAY Slasher film!!!

HellBent is the terrifying original new feature from writer/director Paul Etheredge-Ouzts and Joseph Wolf, the co-creator of such horror classics as Halloween and A Nightmare on Elm Street. With a serial killer on the loose during West Hollywood 's Halloween Carnival, four gay friends will have to fight for their lives to make it through a night filled with flamboyant costumes, beautiful people, drugs, music and sex.
A wild, relentless ride that combines appealing characters, unexpected surprises, and shocking scares, HellBent is a refreshing new classic for the horror genre.